Cab Ride Through Kink

Imagine a guy getting into the back of a taxi.

“Where to?” says the driver.

“Um, I don't know,” says the guy. “I just wanna go for a ride.”

“Ok. You don't wanna go anywhere specific?”

“Not really. I mean I might want dinner or something, maybe.”

“So should I take you to a restaurant?”

“I don't know.”

“How about a movie? You like movies?”

“Not sure. I've never really been to one.”

“Ok, well how about a concert.”

“Haven't tried that either, but I don't think it sounds fun.”

“Hm... well we can't take a trip unless you have a destination. Are you sure you don't have someplace in mind?”

“Not really.”

“You want me to pick?”

“Well maybe, but what if I don't like what you choose?”

“Ok, tell you what... you said you might be hungry, right?”

“Yeah.”

“But you don't want to go to a restaurant.”

“Well, not exactly. I might want to. I just don't know.”

“How about if we drive by? You can go in, look around, maybe try a bite or two and see if you like it.”

“I don't think I want to.”

“Buddy, I can't take you somewhere if you don't know where you want to go.”

“But I know where I want to go.”

“Ok, so where do you want to go?”

“Out.”

“Out's a big place. You're gonna have to get a little more specific.”

“Well, someplace in the same city... maybe.”

“Ok, so somewhere in this city. But it's a big city.”

“Wait, let's not limit ourselves. Going to the next city might be kinda fun.”

“So you maybe want to go to a different city? That's a long ride, pal.”

“Yeah, you're right. Maybe I should stay here.”

“Ok, so any idea yet about where you wanna go?”

“You're the driver, shouldn't you know?”

“Buddy, you got any idea how many people take cabs every day? Every single one of them wants to go someplace different. If everyone wanted to go the same place they'd all take the bus.”

“Wait, so you don't know where I need to go?”

“Well, I can make suggestions, but it's your trip. You gotta tell me what you're trying to do.”

“I just want some fresh air.”

“The park then, maybe?”

“Maybe. But it's cold there. And it's dark.”

“Tell me again why you called a cab.”

“I wanna go.... somewhere. I think.”

“Ok so what made you want to go somewhere?”

“I don't know.”

“You aren't hungry?”

“Not really.”

“Don't need to shop for anything?”

“No.”

“Don't want to go visit anybody?”

“Nope.”

“So you wanna just drive around for awhile? See the sights? Maybe see if something strikes your fancy?”

“No, I want to have like the best most amazing cab ride ever.”

“Without knowing where you want to go.”

“Look, you're the driver. You really should know.”

“I told you, people go different places. And you don't want to go the wrong place.”

“well don't you know the right place?”

“Not unless you know what kind a place you need.”

“Don't you just drive people wherever?”

“Sometimes, but most of the time someone has at least some idea of where they wanna go before they get in the cab.”

“Oh, well I've never taken a cab before. I really don't know everywhere cabs go.”

“but something made you call one.”

“Yeah, I just wanted to try it.”

“Ok, so what made you want to try it?”

“I don't know.”

“Did you see pictures of someone in a cab? Maybe a movie that made a cab ride seem exciting?”

“Not really.”

“So you just woke up one day and decided you wanted to take a cab.”

“Yeah.”

“Ever dream about it? Have fantasies? Do you think about taking a cab?”

“Not really.”

“So then why did you call one?”

“I just saw the ad and thought I should.”

“You know how taking a cab works, right?”

“No.”

“Want me to explain?”

“You don't really have to. I'm not interested.”

“Ok, so maybe we'll go around the block, tell me to stop if you see someplace you want to go.”

“I don't want to have to tell you how to drive me. You're supposed to know. That's what I'm paying you for.”

“No. You're paying me to know how to get to a specific place and drive you there safely. I decide how we get there, but you gotta tell me where you wanna go.”

“but I don't know any places to go.”

“Then why did you call the cab?”

“I just wanted to.”

“Ok. I would love to make you happy and take you on the best cab ride ever, but if you don't have some idea where you want to go we could end up driving around all night and never find anyplace you like.”

“Don't you have places most people want to go?”

“Yeah, but I suggested all those already and you didn't like any of them.”

“I thought the point of taking a cab was to let someone else decide where to go.”

“Yes and no. You can pick a destination, or we can pick it together, or I can pick it for you, but you have to have at least some idea of what kind of place you'd like to end up.”

“Wait, so you're saying I have to know where I want to go before you can take me there?”

“Pretty much.”

“So people don't all go to the same places?”

“Not usually. One person might want to go to a bar, another might want to go to the art museum, and a third might want to go to the grocery store. It all depends on what they need.”

“And they have to tell you? You don't just know?”

“No, I don't. Now if I know someone a long time and drive em around a lot I start to know where they like to go and can show up at their door before they even know they want a ride. But I can't do that with someone I've never met before. People are just too different.”

“But can't you just guess?”

“I can, but I might get it totally wrong, and that could be bad. If I take someone who wants to go to the art museum to the bar they might get in a fight and get hurt, or if I take the guy who wants to go to the bar to art museum he's just gonna get bored. And if I take the person who wants to go to the grocery store to the airport, they're not gonna get any food and then they'll still be hungry. I won't do a good job and they'll be unhappy.”

“Man, this is way too complicated. I just wanna go for a ride.”

“So tell me where to.”

“But if you can't figure it out, how am I supposed to?”

“Buddy, you're the only one who can.”

“Hm...”

The man thinks for several long moments.

“Are you sure you're a cab driver?”

The moral of this story:

You have to know what you want before someone can give it to you!!!