Based on a real-life, but unfortunately unknown thoughtless clod:
Dear Driver,
We regret to inform you that we have discovered your vehicle parked at a dangerous angle in front of a bus stop. This will not do. Your vehicle is blocking the turning lane, causing drivers to have to make unsafe turns from the center lane. It is also parked at an angle that causes the rear end to cross into the neighboring lane, causing an additional obstacle to drivers. Worst of all your reckless parking has forced the buses to stop in the middle of the street, posing an extra hazard to passengers boarding and de-boarding the bus by forcing them to cross through a traffic lane to reach the curb.
Therefore, your vehicle has been towed. In addition, we must ask you to appear at our Office of Corrections at 8 A.M. tomorrow morning. Your vehicle will be returned to you upon completion of your appointment. Should you not appear, we will be forced to suspend your driver's license and confiscate your vehicle permanently.
As you are obviously incapable of driving or parking a vehicle responsibly, please have someone else bring you to your appointment. You are advised to wear loose clothing and to bring something soft to sit on for the trip home.
Sincerely,
Senior Parking Enforcement Officer 01867
2 comments:
That would be so much more effective than a fine!
If only!
Hugs,
Hermione
I remember pulling into Chicago late one night, finding the store where I was unloading my first drop, and deciding to park in the alley, and sleep for the few hrs until they opened.
We were awakened by one of Chicago's finest an hr or so later, and told we couldn't park there, we were blocking the alley.
Well we weren't. his patrol car got by us, and besides we argued, the store would open in two hrs, and we'd be gone. Surely the city of Chicago could survive without the use of this alley that long. The cop went back to his car,got on his radio, and ten minutes later, parking ticket in hand, I was being cussed up one side, and down the other by a grizzled old sargent.
Too bad your method couldn't have been employed for me then. mmmmmmmmmm.
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